When we were in Uganda William wanted his daddy. That was all he wanted. It was understandable of course, he had plenty of mamas. Mandy had told us in advance that the kids, especially the boys, longed for men in their lives. She would tell us how they would respond when male volunteers would come to the home. Anyway, after a couple of weeks in Uganda, this was not getting any better. It wasn't just that he wanted his daddy, he didn't want anything to do with me. So we would roam about and Richard would have William and I would have Marissa. It became apparent that Marissa was wanting some daddy time too. Richard made the decision that it was time to start nudging William toward me. This started with simply having him sit by me in the car, and hold my hand while we walked that day...so that Marissa could be with her daddy. You would think this went well right? Not at all! William scooted all the way across the seat as far as he could and wailed. We hadn't seen him cry like this before. Then when we got out of the truck, and I tried to hold his hand, he would yank it away, and look for Richard. His wanting and adoring his daddy I was prepared for....his total rejection of me...no way I could prepare for that. I knew mentally that this would pass, and would change over time. There was no convincing my heart that William would one day have a bond with me. Thankfully, things have changed, and William loves and wants both of us. He has begun to see the benefits of having both a mommy and a daddy.
This morning, he came and snuggled up with me in bed. He stayed for quite a while. It was sweet to my soul to have him on my chest. Normally, I would let him snuggle as long as he wanted, but it was 9:00 and I had no business still being in bed (in my defense we went to bed late, I still had not slept 7 hours) and I needed to get up. So I ask him if he wants to go and snuggle with daddy. His response was to hold me tighter, smile, and say "no." I stayed in bed :)
Soon we had four other blessings snuggled in too.
Life is good.
2 comments:
Adam DEFINITELY loved Daddy more at first too. Now, he's kind of equal, I think.
ah ha! now i get it. you're cleared of all pj guilt. me? i was just lazzzE.
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